Celebrating 3 Years: A Fruity Anniversary

We are celebrating 3 years already. It certainly doesn't seem like long to some, but to us-it's a milestone. We've now been married. . .
longer than any relationship we've ever had with another.
long enough that my niece and nephew don't remember me apart from "Auntie Beezy and Uncle Mike".
equivalent to a common sentence for hackers and sex offenders.
as long as Goosebumps  lasted on TV.
as long as it takes many fruit trees to actually bear fruit.

3 years is also the magic number we discussed repeatedly in graduate school as the length of time it takes for a change to become the norm in much of society. So, are we bearing fruit  after three years or just becoming the norm ? It's a valid question. We've certainly established norms and routine in our shared lives over the past years. We've had to. If we repeated the first year over and over again, we'd look at least 40 by now (not that 40 is bad but I wanna look 25 while I'm 25)! I'd rather think we are more like the mango trees that can take up to 3 years to mature. That certainly sounds nicer, right? Plus, Mike would love to hear from me that I believe he's matured in the last 3 years!

I want to bear fruit! I'm not just talking Genesis style. I want to be fruitful in other ways. My favorite definition of the word comes from Merriam-Webster:
fruit·ful \ ˈfrüt-fəl\ : abundantly productive <a fruitful  discussion>

Wow! Who wouldn't want to be abundantly productive ? For those of you reading who know me well, you may be chuckling. For those of you who may know Mike well, you may be rolling with laughter! :)  I'm totally serious. I want to do well together and separately whatever we're doing-work, home, love, friends, family and otherwise. Looking back, I actually think we both value this. When we discussed the highlights of our last year together, the things that came up were purchases (forgive us because they were big ones; we're not materialists or anything) and projects. We both value finished products-tangible outcomes from our efforts. Seeing this, I think we can certainly take on the challenge to be fruitful in many activities. The number one area we want to be fruitful is obviously in our marriage and we have realized it takes work and communication to stay with it but we've seen the rewards and certainly don't want to stop here.

Speaking of communication, did you notice the example the definition offers exemplifying being abundantly productive: <a fruitful  discussion>? What wife doesn't want more fruitful discussion from her husband? That is definitely something we had in courtship and something I hope to continue throughout our marriage. We actually had a surprisingly fruitful discussion with our host on our anniversary date. I wish I could illustrate the entire conversation in text including his thick and entertaining accent, but I can't so I'll just get through the story with less grandiose than if I were telling you this in person!
Our Date

Mike made reservations at Galleria de Paco in Waterloo for our actual anniversary evening and we were both excited about the 4-course meal ahead. We knew we were in for an amazingly artistic atmosphere and great food. I had also heard about the charismatic host who adds to the ambiance. He certainly got us off to quite a start.

He asked if we were celebrating anything special immediately upon arrival while taking our coats. Mike smiled with a bit of pride as he said "Our three-year wedding anniversary". The host exclaimed with excitement which just added to Mike proud expression and certainly brought a smile to my face. "Congratulations" came with the shaking of each of our hands for the second time since our arrival two minutes prior. "Now, imagine thirty-five. Thirty-five years how long for me."

"Wow. So, you must know a secret!" I responded followed by Mike: "Yeah, what is your secret?".

"Secret? Hmm. You will fight. It will happen. He make mistake to you. You make mistake to him. Little fight. Secret is you make sorry right away. You do apologies every time. Then, forgive and throw to garbage. Forget mistake and go on. If not forgive, it just build and build and build. Then, BOMB and split apart. Most fights are for nothing. Nothing."

At this point, we're making our way through the broken English and surprisingly engrossed in this short and unexpected lecture. Valuing our undivided attention, he continues.

"Imagine. He goes to start car and battery no good. Does not start. He get out slam door and kick it. You come and ask what's wrong?  He say **** off." Umm, did he just say that?  "Now, you mad. He mad. And over nothing! Just an example. BUT, he make apology right away, you forgive, throw it away and be happy again. No little nothing fights stay to cause explosion." Mike breaks in with a beautiful accurate comment, "Good thing I'm perfect!" Oh brother. . .

"Apology does not mean you admit wrong. No matter who it is. You. Her. Others. You hurt feelings, you make apology every time. Then it be fixed, no explosion. Happy life. Kay? Let me show you to your table." We follow silently both grinning and still reeling through the last five minutes. "Thank you for coming to Galleria de Paco and enjoy your meal tonight."

Well, if that wasn't the most elaborate but simple advice we've gotten, I don't know what is. It certainly made for a memorable evening and gave me an idea for my new year's resolution. Though "I'm sorry" and "I forgive you" are taught repeatedly to school-aged children, adults tend to suck at it. So, my New Year's resolution is to teach Mike to apologize more often. Just kidding! Besides, didn't you know he's perfect?!?!?

All I Got for Christmas

Presents are my least favorite part of Christmas. Does that sound harsh? I don't mean I hate getting or giving them but it's the pressure that comes along with it. I love Christmas for all the other reasons: church, caroling, and shared stories and memories from Christmases past. Yet, so much time ends up going into gift shopping, wrapping, and decision-making while still leaving worry that you may not have gotten "enough' or 'the right thing". I give up. As you're aware, I threw in the towel and indulged in homemade treats and treasures for many. For others, I try to keep this in mind: give a present that shows I know you and care enough to buy you something you need or want. My own wish lists are based on practicality and the wishes I have that don't make the list are secret hopes of meaningful and significant gifts. You know-it's the thought that counts sort of items. I'm happy to report that I was very pleased with great Christmas takeaways that fell into both categories.

Kindle
I'll start with the biggie. It was actually a pretty small gift but it was certainly the one I was most excited to receieve. It's a gift that keeps on giving and I can make use of it endlessly. Of course it comes with the need to accessorize so I'll be spending my Christmas money doing so! I have already read from it every night since I brought it home AND the book I've been reading was free! I will be able to upload free books on it frequently and always have a book at my fingertips. I'm thrilled with its size, ease of use, and cheaper book selection. The only downfalls are that you need a light to read in the dark as it does not have a backlit screen, I have to download only at home where I have wi-fi but can then read wherever I may be, and I have to accessorize it because I feel that it's extremely unprotected and fragile. Overall, I think I may get the most use out of this gift than any other.

My Sign
My sister got me a sign that reads: "Fort Madison est. 2010". This is for our playhouse in our backyard. It's significant because our home is on Madison Street. We joked that the playhouse could be our fort and it quickly came to be nicknamed Fort Madison. This is made all the more clever in that my husband was born and raised in Fort Madison, Iowa. So, he will have a little reminder of his childhood home while watching his own children play in their outdoor abode. Very thoughtful and meaningful and I can't wait to get it up!

The BIG Gift
This was the big gift we had heard mention of for months leading up to Christmas. We were told by my in-laws that they got us a present that was so big, we'd have to make our 180-mile trip in our small truck. This, of course, came as both good news and bad. What could we possibly be getting that would take up that much space? The first story was that it actually scuffed their brand new SUV when they brought it home and came in 2 boxes-one of which rode on their luggage rack. Next, we found out that Ruth actually injured herself helping Gary get the package in and out of the car and house. When we went to Fort Madison for Thanksgiving, they had to take it to the grandparents' house for storage becasue it had to sit in their front entryway unwrapped up to that point because it was too large to take take upstairs or down.

All of these stories about a box we could not figure out. We hadn't asked for anything that big and couldn't even think of anything we mentioned wanting that they may have picked up on. We were at a loss. My only guess was that it belonged outside. After all, if just one of the boxes couldn't even fit past their entryway, where in the world would something of that size go in our own house? The day finally came to open presents and it was certainly the elephant in the room. It was the last gift to be opened and it was our new patio set! It will definitely get a lot of use especially since Mike considered it encouragament to build a deck sooner than later in our big backyard where only a patio already exists.

The Flashback Pack
We also got a pack that included our favorite movie candies, popcorn, pajama pants and movies. The movies were the significant part. Each was a movie that was a foravorite hwne we were kids. Mike got the collection of all the TMNT movies-the non-animated series! Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles for those of you still stuck on the acronym! I got Teen Witch and Little Monsters! Both were crowd favorites at our house growing up so it will be a blast to be able to break these DVDs out whenever the mood strikes. It was very thoughtful!

The Card & Ornament Exchange
Every year, Mike and I get each other a Christmas card. I don't think it's a terribly common habit amongst couples from what I've polled so far, but I'll never forget feeling like a great big jerk the first time I got one from Mike. We were newly engaged by our first Christmas and I thought that ring was gift enough for that and the next Christmas at least! There was his cardour first Christmas morning together and there I was with no card to trade in return. Never again! They're sometimes funny, sometimes mushy, always sweet and always from the heart.

Also, every year, we get each other an ornament. Inside the package (most often a Hallmark box) we write the story of why we selected that particualr ornament for the other person. That way, we can read those stories every year as we get the ornaments out. It's a tradition I love. This year, I got:

 

Now, why would Mike ever think of getting this for me? He says I'm the one others come for advice which I find to be very complimentary. Most of all, he says I'm the person he knows he can come to for advice and that was an amazing compliment for Christmas. However, I certianly hope he think it's worth more than 5 cents as the ornament might suggest! :)

His ornament:

A cave man for his man cave! Yes, this was the year we got a new home but we'd done that before. What was significant about this house? He has the finished basement I knew he deserved as a retreat and would deserve even more in years to come as little people take over our space (and lives). Now, his man cave isn't exactly without it's feminine touches in decor, but it's still where his huge TV sits in a dark space next to the fireplace with a mini-bar included so it counts as a man cave!

Time
The best gift of all was the time we got to spend with nearly all of our family and the time we're still planning to spend with others as we celebrate all of the spelendor of the holiday season. Despite the snow, sickness, and mad schedules, we got to see our loved ones and spend Christmas with each other!

Christmas Treats and Treasures

As promised, I am sharing more of my ideas for Christmas treats and treasures. Personalized gifts are wonderful projects for the frugal friend. I love to share the holiday spirit with my loved ones WITHOUT getting overcome by expenses. I have fun making things at home and even more fun personalizing them. Here is a bundle for our friends, the Fords.

On your left, you have a personalized soap dispenser with a festive ribbon. This can be done within a very reasonable budget or taken up a notch with more flashy accessories and expensive hand soaps.

Necessary items:

Soap Bottles

Goo Gone

Paper Towels

Wire-edged ribbon

Stickers

Scissors

This bottle had all the labels taken off and Goo Gone got the rest of the residue. Then, I personalized it with their last name in stickers. You could also use seasonal or inspirational words for those with names too long for a bottle. The ribbon used at the top had a wire edge which made it easier to form into a neat bow. As I am just now giving these out at Christmas, I didn't want to make the ribbon too seasonal. With the right color choices, this could be a party favor or gift basket item for any occasion!

In the center is a gladware container full of homemade candies: peanut butter balls, oreo dreams, chocolate covered ritz peanut butter sandwiches, thin mint snowmen, peppermint bark snowmen with dark chocolate bottoms,  almond bark pretzels, etcetera. . . Recipes for the snowmen below. The lid is decorated with scrapbooking paper cut to fit and topped with scraps on which to write a Christmas message. Glue dots made the creation easy to attach to the lid even with its ridges.

Peppermint Bark Snowmen
6 squares White Almond bark (melted)
1 Cup Rice Krispies (crushed)
1 Cup Peppermint Candies (chopped)
1 bag dark chocolate morsels (melted)
Candy molds (or an ice cube tray will work just fine)

Use your double boiler method or a small crock to melt the almond bark and the dark chocolate (separately). Of course, be careful not to burn either as they are finicky ingredients.

Place your peppermint candies in a food processor to be chopped finely rather than beating your counter to death! Combine with your crushed rice krispies.

Add the candie krispie mix to your melted white almond bark and pour into molds until 1/2 to 2/3 full. Then, pour the melted dark chocolate to fill the remaining portion of each mold.

Refrigerate to set and enjoy or share!

Thin Mint Snowmen
It's time to share those yummy girl scout treats you've been hoarding!
12 squares (full pkg) Chocolate Almond Bark (melted)
1 Roll Thin Mints (crushed)

Melt. Crush. Mix. Mold. Refrigerate. It's just that easy and they are yummy!

Finally, on your right is the apple butter recipe featured last month. To keep the gift set matching, I did a circle cutout of similar scrapbooking paper to tuck inside the lid. With a fine-point sharpie, a personal message adds just a little something extra to another homemade treat.

There are only two things that would have made these craft and candy-making projects more fun: company and more leftovers! Happy gifting and Merry Christmas!

Pupdate

We started obedience training with our kids a couple of weeks ago. For those of you who don’t know their story, here’s a brief version. We got Tucker in January 2009 when Mike insisted we were ready and stable enough for puppy parenting. He was supposed to be our trial before having kids. In July 2010, we got him a little canine sister instead. When Lily came into the picture, Tucker changed a bit.

He’s a brilliant people pleaser who loves to kiss, particularly on the mouth, and has taken very well to training for all sorts of tricks: sit, lay, roll over, dance, up (jumping into our arms) and so on. Lily coasted of Tucker’s accomplishments hoping she’d get the same amount of treats just for looking cute next to him. So, we decided to do some training with the objective of having them equally tricky and working on greeting and walking. I swear that their combined power of 36 pounds is enough to pull a car from a ditch by the way some walks go. The small dog complex barks are shrill and chilling despite their cute little faces.

So, each Wednesday, we pack a crapload of dog treats, mats, water, toys, and leashes and head to training. Since, our sweet-natured but rowdy dogs (not puppies) seem to have taken on some new behaviors. It’s like the stress of walking them in to a foreign place with tight space where the number of new people at least double the number of new dogs has led them to act out in ways they never did before we decided to embark (ha ha) on this training adventure. So, our dogs are the naughty kids in class. They’re attached to their parents, defensive of each other, and a bit more aggressive than I’d like to see when Tucker’s not busy showboating. Giving Tucker a little sister has made him much more protective and Lily feeds off of his reaction to whatever the stimulant may be.

At home, Lily is sitting, laying, coming, and kenneling on command rather than lingering in Tucker’s shadow and we have a ways to go. It’s nice to see our dogs prosper at home but they really need to be socialized. This truly is a test of parenting. I was pretty defensive at any insinuation that my dogs had any behavioral issues. Mike even implied that it may be the other dog’s fault because Tucker’s never reacted to any other dog that way. Home is where they’re best and home is where they are most. But, we’re hoping that more weeks of visits, cheddar cheese, and hot dogs will get them to be angels outside the house as well! We’ll keep you pupdated!

Recent Reminders & Realizations

I've recently been blessed to come to some new realizations and been reminded of things that brighten my day. I am certain there are some other young wives will relate to.

For instance, I realized that . . .
I have only owned a crock pot and an apron for about 3 years. Yet, I just spent my Saturday with both!
My in-laws are beginning to see our two dogs as their grandchildren. . . and that makes me smile.
Special people in my life remember songs I once sang that were special to them. . . and I even had my sister call and ask for a verse to be belted out over the phone.
No one ever "taught me to cook". Who really gets taught to cook anyway?
At least half of success is found in just trying.
Offering recipes to someone can make you a sweetheart or something much worse. Know that I share in love! See my latest twist on my chicken tortilla soup recipe below!

I was recently reminded. . .
I like my job because of its rewards AND its challenges.
My husband is happy with my cooking. He told a girl at work that, in 3 years, he can only recall 2 bad dinners and he said it with pride.
Old friends, and I mean the "older" kind, are valuable for reasons I never expected. 
To thank my husband for the little things. After all, going to the grocery store on a busy Saturday morning and navigating the baking isle for him is like me going to the auto store trying to find the right brand, type, and amount of oil for my car.
And asking for help is not an option for a man at the grocery store. And that's okay-if it takes him twice as long to find things and get back home, I'll not complain and thank him for his effort.
Our kitchen belongs to Mike and I just work in it. Ask him. When I make food to share with other people, he acts like I'm breaking some solemn vow I didn't know I took. :)
And playing in the snow isn't just for kids. . . hence finishing a blog nearly an hour after I started it. :)

Chicken Tortilla Soup
2 chicken breasts cooked and shredded
1 packet taco seasoning
2 cans chicken broth
1 can cheddar cheese soup
1 can mexicorn
1/4 lb Velveeta
1/2 onion chopped
3 cloves garlic minced
1/2 green pepper chopped
2 tablespoons vegetable oil

In a large skillet, heat the vegetable oil to a medium heat. Add the chopped veggies and cook until softened.

In another bowl, place your shredded chicken and cover in the packet of taco seasoning. Place lid on top and shake to coat.

Add all remaining ingredients plus the chicken and veggies to a crock pot or stovetop kettle and heat to preferred temperature for service.

Serve with sour cream, shredded cheese and tortilla chips to accessorize this easy restaurant favorite at home!

Just Smile and Wag

If you have dogs that steal your heart with these two simple actions, you are not alone. While I did not anticipate this to be so, it happened rather quickly with one pup leading to two. Several times, I've needed to see a smile and wag to distract from fury (note the destroyed pillow pictured below). As if smiles and wags weren't enough, occasionally, these 2 canine kiddos give us pleasure in unexpected ways that are worth sharing with all of you.

The latest is Tucker's discovery of the touch lamp. We have a 3-way touch lamp on our bedside table. It dimly lights our trips in and out of bed. Tucker realized this as well. So, he recently discovered that the touch of his very own nose would light the lamp which is enough to rise me from my slumber. Adorable at 6 or later; annoying any earlier. Communication is his strong suit even without words!

I am certain there will be several more smile-provoking stories to share as we start their obedience training courses in just a couple days. Weekly, we'll round up their mats, 400 pea-sized treats, water dishes, harnesses and leashes and take them to a small environment where 2 other dogs and their owners will have just as much crap in an effort to add structure to their lives. Sounds like a recipe for success, right? Like I said, more stories will inevitably follow. Til then, try smiling and wagging your own way of your next mess and let me know how it goes!

A Tale of 2 Trees. . . okay 3

While marriage is about compromise, we've got the picture of it this Christmas season. Both of our personalities show through in the disagreement over what a Christmas Tree should look like. My preference: white lights, neat, ordered, coordinated, evenly distributed ornaments with a matching theme or color scheme. Mike's preference: colored lights, mismatched ornaments old and new, tinsel, sparkle and disorder. We started with one tree easily acquired with a December wedding to start us out. In a small first home, we kept that tree and decorated it in matching ornaments all the same color as the wedding decorations from the year prior. Fast forward two more Christmases to a house with two floors and that leaves the need for TWO TREES! Now, at first, Mike was not on board. . . until I found the perfect prim tree at an awesome deal through a friend. He went for it.

You'd think two trees would settle any issues over the competing ideals. To the contrary, the control freak in me saw placing colored lights on a pre-lit tree with white bulbs already in place as a pretty dumb idea. When Mike proposed an alternative to include hanging colored lights from the basement ceiling instead. . . well, I caved. The two of us are stubborn but always want the other to be happy. (I would say this is only under these conditions that compromise truly works.) Hence, the 2 trees Mike gave into and the colored lights adorning the basement tree. You can tell our hearts are in the right place even if the lights aren't.








How does this somehow still turn into three trees? Well, we're not the only two family members in the Decker house. Thus, Tucker and Lily have their very own tree too. It's adorned with paw prints to state the obvious. By the color scheme and orderly ornament placement, you can tell I did the decorating but it's still all for them. In the end, while I love my prim tree with homemade decorations, I seem to think our future gift openings will take place next to the basement fireplace surrounded by colored lights and mismatched ornaments. None ranks higher than the other; all are fun and enjoyable bringing holiday cheer to our home. But mine is  tallest! :)